Sleeping in with Scout by my side.
Hot dogs and pasta for breakfast/lunch.
Doctors note.
Cartoons.
Hot, steamy shower.
Cold, homemade sweet tea.
Thick socks.
Waiting for the UPS man.
Catnaps.
Clouds.
Malabrigo.
Foggy Seas Scarf, Malabrigo Sock Yarn in Impressionist Skies
I feel like my body is betraying me.
Twenty eight years I’ve lived in this body and it’s constantly changing.
My blood feels toxic.
Riddled with pain. Aches. Lumps.
I don’t look forward to waking up.
Me legs are sore.
The cold penetrates my joints.
And yet, I knit.
I knit to forget.
I knit to heal.
I just knit.
Norwegian Baby Cap for Scout
US 2 needles
Ella Rae Lace Merino
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1. Oh, I am so conflicted!
2. My mood changes, big and little.
3. During Scout’s naptime, I tend to get things done.
4. Jem has pink eye! ; are you kidding me???
5. Right now I’d like to be vacationing.
6. My Kitchen Aid Mixer is my favorite gadget.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to a quiet evening, tomorrow my plans include whale watching and Sunday, I want to wake up late to breakfast in bed!
Thursday.
Dense fog and a light drizzle.
Banana bread baking.
Runny noses.
A milestone for Dalton.
Beef stew warming in the crock pot.
Scout playing in a diaper box.
The slight clink of something metal turning in the dryer.
Waiting.
An ice cold root beer.
Sweats and thermals.
And some knitting.
Sweet Baby Cap in Ella Rae Lace Merino for Scout
And to top it off I attended the Ravelry party at Unwind in Burbank last night. I was the quiet one that kept to myself. I had a good time with fellow Raveler’s and brought home some goodies, like a new Namaste Bag:
I also grabbed some Ella Rae Lace:
It looks an awful lot like the Malabrigo I bought at SnB last week:
Both are intended as lace projects. Yes, you heard me correctly. With the exception of Charlotte’s Web Shawl I have not knit lace. Not real lace anyway. I’ve been spending quite a bit of time on Ravelry, (what else do you do when you are sick), looking at lace projects and have a few queued. No definites yet though.
This week seemed quite long when I look back at all the stuff I didn’t do.
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Friday Fill In # 107
1. Enough with the warm weather.
2. Insomnia causes me to be conflicted.
3. I’ve been craving french fries and a chocolate shake.
4. I Love Lucy makes me laugh.
5. I wish I could go back home to Chicago next week.
6. Living freely has been on my mind lately.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to curling up on the couch watching movies with Shawn, tomorrow my plans include knitting with a new friend and Sunday, I want to explore the zoo!
Today is a day filled with mixed emotions. I woke up mid morning to the rhythmic sounds of the falling and rising of Shawn’s light snoring. In a way I was lucky that he stayed home. In a way I’m a bit unlucky. Lucky because most days I miss him and wish that he didn’t have to break his back for the rest of his life to put food on the table and to pay the bills. Unlucky because I could get used to having him home on days he should be at work. We’ve been together a solid three years minus the days I was in the hospital during my surgeries. I’ve never gotten used to the daily humdrum of him leaving at 5 and returning at 3. If I had my way we would spend the rest of our days laying in bed in our pajama’s or taking drives to unknown destinations.
Today is just one of those days. I feel dependent. I feel like there are just too many things to do and there isn’t any time to do any of it. I feel like the past is cloudy and the future bleak. I feel sad and empty yet a bit relieved. You see, we had to take our little bundle of furriness back to her owners the other night. She was sick and it was something that I could not take responsibility for. In so many ways I want to replace her, to make things better. But that is selfish. So I will grieve in all the ways I know how and try to remember the couple of days that she bright light in our lives. I haven’t brought myself to contacting the owners. I don’t want to know the outcome. I want to think that she’s pulling through, maybe running around her with her brothers and sisters. I want to think that she remembers the family who loved her so, even if only for a few brief moments.
I try to fill this void. It’s a difficult task. Sometimes I think I’ll finish the crystal bracelet that needs a few more rows on one side. Or I will start my quilt for the Four Seasons Quilt Swap, even if only to draw out some of my ideas. Maybe I’ll get to scrubbing the bathroom like I’ve intended on for the past couple of weeks.
Instead, I sit. I read. I finished reading The Last Chinese Chef and started ‘Tis. I read other peoples stories because I really don’t want to think of my own. I’ve even managed to watch a few recorded shows on our DVR. “I Love Lucy” can do wonders for ones’ spirits.
I’ve even managed to knit. I finished sock #1 of the Secret Husband Socks and have already started #2. For once I don’t feel daunted by the dreaded second sock. I am also in the process of starting my big project. The one. The one that has Fair Isle and steeks. The one that will fill that bit of emptiness that seems to keep me grounded.
Louet Gems Fingering in Caribou, Champange and Navy for Little Birds by Ysolda Teague
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1. It’s January; it’s the beginning of something new.
2. French fries and ice cream is what I crave most right now.
3. Cork and wine go together like peanut butter and chocolate.
4. Sunshine is so nourishing.
5. Let us dare tohope.
6. The wind is whipping around the walls of my home.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to Friday night Stitch and Bitch with friends, tomorrow my plans include going on a Scion cruise with Shawn and Sunday, I want to sleep all day!
Shawn resisted. Or tried to anyhow. But I persisted. I want a baby, I’d say. You have a baby, he’d say. I want another baby, I’d fire back. At first he said no up and down. Later his answer was only a little one. Then his answer was this:
{ smile}
I’d been looking online for a while. I checked the shelters a dozen times a day, I checked rescues, I checked Craigslist from Los Angeles to San Diego, I checked the Recycler ads on Thursday and perused the Pennysaver ads on Wednesday nights.
And then I saw a picture of this cute little freckle faced pup and her two brothers and two sisters. How could we resist? So we took the hour drive to the middle of nowhere this is the Texas Chainsaw Massacre type countryside drive to visit. We should buy a collar and leash now, Shawn said. We are only going to look, I replied. { He rolls his eyes. }
And here she is all tuckered out. We are still deliberating on names. Shawn likes Sheeba. I think Sheeba is a cat name. She is part Australian Cattle dog and the other part, well I guess we’d have to take her to Maury to find out who the daddy is. She looks a bit Border Collie to me, but time will tell. She doesn’t like being on a leash much but she’s adjusting. She sleeps in between our bed and my nightstand and loves to nap under the coffee table. Dalton doesn’t mind her, maybe because she isn’t the typical get in your face type puppy. Marilyn likes to play with her but doesn’t like getting too close. The jury is out with her.
But they won’t be out long. Our new puppy has been a joyful addition. She makes us laugh and keeps us on our toes. Just like any other baby. Only fuzzy. And drooly.
In some parts of the world they are ringing in the New Year but here in So Cal we are 10 hours away from the beginning of a new year. I anticipate the new year. I welcome it’s newness. I welcome the resolutions. I welcome a fresh start.
I even welcome crossing over some of my projects that I started in my haste to cast on a new yarn. I decided to make Shawn a pair of socks for his birthday with the Malabrigo he bought me for Christmas. I’m making it up as I go along. I’m enjoying using a new yarn. I’m enjoying each stitch. I think of when he will put these socks on to ward off the nip in the air this winter. How they will comfort him. How they will remind him that someone cares so much for him. As of today, I have 28 days to finish. It shouldn’t be a problem but I find that my knitting has dwindled a bit with the holidays.
I decided on a twisted rib for the cuff, much more clean and elastic in my opinion. The rest will be a garter stitch rib found in a stitch dictionary.
As for my resolutions, well they are simple.
1. My goal is to read 48 books this year.
2. Take formal sewing classes, (this starts next Tuesday).
3. Finish the confounded Vogue Cable Tunic from 2005.
4. Knit more teddy bears for the Mother Bear Project.
5. Get back to exercising 3-4 times a week.
6. Join the Santa Clarita Quilter’s Guild.
7. Live simple.
I hope everyone has a happy and safe New Years! Cheers.
iKnit.iPurl 