The story actually begins with something that occurred last week. (I am going to try and make a long story short, so bear with me.) I was a part of a mother’s group in the city I live in. I decided I would help and be a part of a birthday party committee to help celebrate the one year anniversary of the website’s making. Basically it came down to me needing a break from the stress. I had offered to do the baking for bake sales, but the bake sales turned into these elaborate and complicated plans. Neither of which interested me. I had let some of the women on the website know that I would be taking a computer break but I would still do the baking. I had let the manager know I didn’t want to be in charge of all of the plans, yet I would still participate. That day I got a phone call telling me that I needed to get on the computer and that I couldn’t take a break. After that there was a volley of emails, none of them friendly or supportive. This made be rethink being part of a group. While most people were understanding and contacted me to see if I needed anything the manager did not. Her concern lay only with the party plans. Fast forward to Friday. I was getting ready to do the baking for the sale on Saturday morning. I was preparing for our babysitting co op meet. I was putting my stuff together for the knitting night gathering. Then I get an email, from the manager, telling me that I wasn’t welcome to join the babysitting co op because of my “mental condition”.
Well, if you know me you know that I did not take this lightly. My “mental condition” has never stopped me from being a mother, an employee, a wife, a student, a friend. My “mental condition” hasn’t inhibited me in the least. My last email to her was that she was just trying to find excuses to take me off the group due to her own personal opinions of me, (this was after speaking to a number of people on the group and asking them how they felt about the situation), and that in no uncertain terms did I want to associate myself with someone as hypocritical and controlling as she was. Not to mention, that her son suffers from a form of Bipolar Disorder. I have to wonder how she would react if someone told her son he couldn’t be trusted due to his “mental condition”? What if he was told he couldn’t because an ignorant person just “said so”? Whose to judge who can and who can’t?
So over the past few days I’ve had time to be angry, depressed and contemplative. I’ve also had time to cool off and, to my dismay, realize that there are people out there who are so consumed by negativity that they have nothing to offer to this world. They see no beauty in other people. They disregard peoples feelings and beliefs. There is nothing good in the world for them if they cannot have control over everything. I now realize that she should not feel sorry for me, (and not just because I am a good mother and a good friend and that though she says others aren’t comfortable, I know the truth), but that I should take pity on her. Karma is a bitch as they say. This will come back to her threefold. And maybe then she will truly understand compassion for others.
I tried to make the best of my weekend. I tried not to think of how unhappy I could be, but I basked in the happiness at hand. Shawn and I took the kids to The Descanso Gardens, which I’ve been wanting to go to every time I see Jillian post about it. I even went to Skein in Pasadena, (finally). I didn’t purchase anything but not because there wasn’t anything there that I didn’t like. More of a financial thing. As in: I-don’t-get-paid-til-next-week type of thing. They had some lovely Rowan and Sublime Cashmerino that I had my eyes on. Shawn already knows we’ll be going back. Oh, he knows.
So, I have to say that I’m lucky. Because even though I have a lack of faith in humanity at times I can never disregard the beauty that world has to offer.
There were gorgeous flowers even though you could feel Autumn approaching, I have a feeling that in the Spring time that the gardens are insanely colorful.
Even wildlife, aside from the every day squirrels looking for acorns.
And a little family cuteness.
It’s nice to be able to appreciate what the world has to offer. All you have to is open your eyes and your heart.