I bought this blue and white ceramic bowl at Mervyn’s when I was about 12 years old. She’d seen it in the store and said she liked it. It was near Christmas time and being that my mother is the hardest person to shop for, I figured I’d buy this for her. She, of course, took me to Mervyn’s and waited in the car while I had it gift wrapped.
She still loves the bowl, but has nowhere to put it now that she’s staying with friends. So I have it. On top of my new desk it sits. It reminds me of simpler times. When you are young you don’t realize how much is put into folding the laundry, (especially for four people), or all the dishes one uses when having dinner, (even if you are bbqing), or how hard it is to get those black stains out of your carpet because it attracts everything known to man, or how you need to have food in the house because picking up Taco Bell every day really isn’t a healthy way of life.
Life has become somewhat complicated. Lately, and it seems like I’m not the only one in blogland, I have been very uninspired. (Even when I went to SnB last Friday, I only turned the heel on a sock in about 2 1/2 hours.) I’ve been very unproductive. I wake up thinking what a great day could be had but by evening I’ve yet to accomplish anything. There is a lot going on here. While not unusual, it’s all the same very frustrating. Jem will no longer take his medications. He’s having a barrage of academic and home problems. What the next step is I don’t know. Everyone has their own opinion on ADD and I should say I’m pretty over other people’s opinions. There have been psychiatrists, therapists, social skills classes, in home rehabilitation. No one can seem to agree on anything. I’m looking into the next step. Though I am not sure what that really is.
Shawn will be gone all next week, (again, for work), in Bakersfield. I’ve come to the realization that I, too often, depend on him to be around way too much. Not necessarily to help with the kids or the house, but just having his presence around. It will be an odd sort of week. We haven’t spent much time away from each other since being together. Once when he worked four days in Catalina. And then again when I was in the hospital with Scout. Eight days isn’t much. But here I am, relishing the thought that I will have the house all to myself. My own queen sized bed. I wonder if that will give me the boost of energy I need to get things done?
Scout. Well you know Scout. She’s pretty damn perfect and I don’t think I can ask for much more with her, even when she’s trying to eat my 3mm Swarovski’s. She’s growing. Walking and talking. The other day she was upset that I wouldn’t let her in the kitchen. So like a true actress, (maybe Joan Crawford here), she threw herself to the floor and cried, “Nnnnooooo”. While that was cute, (cause it won’t be in time), she later ran around the house when Shawn came home yelling, “Daaad-eeeee”. Yes, no more “dada”, but daddy. I think he was especially proud of her then.
I know I was.